Have been really busy these few weeks, either studying or going out and never have i been home early before. Maybe thats also the reason why i fell sick today. Damn weak and damn pain, like really sick now. But i guess the heart won't be as pain as when I'm canceling the birthday chalet. All the effort, half the money were gone. Maybe this is numb, maybe this is running away. But i'll do anything to stop hoping or stop thinking about you. How long must it take before i can totally put you aside. My heart still hurts when i hear your name, my heart still skips a beat when i hear about your life. Maybe that's why i'm giving my heart a break, by not hearing you at all and not knowing anything about you or your life.

Maybe i realize my mistakes a little too late, maybe i did all these things a little too late. But at least i've learnt. And i just need someone, anyone to realize and appreciate that.

Exams are really nearing, and i need to study hard this sem. After exams then i'll be able to do anything that i want.

At least i'm busier now, and faced the fact that its really over between us. Three years, looking at all our photos made me realize we've been through too much. Really way too much. But i guess it doesn't really matter anymore. Someone told me to stop hoping, told me to inject opposing thoughts and thats what i'm doing every single day. It's painful, really painful, but he said thats the fastest and hardest way to move on.

I'm really sorry for whatever i've done but i know that i can't have the chance to make it better. But thanks for entering my life, thanks for making all these wonderful memories between us.

Goodbye love.