Shitz stuff happens

I'm sick of all these shitz around me, like srsly. Especially this last year of my life in poly, there are 2 subjects that are pissing me off. Firstly, one v useless subject, secondly, another one no matter how hard you work it's either gna be P or F. Yes, wtf. Sometimes when i sit down, looking at the playground w all those small kids running around chasing each other, reminds me of my past when me and my cousins used to go down in the late afternoon, and during evening like 6.36pm, we'll go back up for dinner. Sometimes we will feel reluctant cause we didn't had enough yet, sometimes we are willingly to go back home cause we're exhausted. So fking nice, right? No problems, no stress, no pressures, only naggings from parents every single day. Easy life, but not everyone knows how to appreciate. Anw, wednesday is always tiring i swear but am glad tht there's no sch tmr. Today i saw the most beautiful person, Joyce, shitz idk what's wrong w me but i knw she's irresistable, seeing her putting her hands on other girls' shoulders just zzzz can't wait to be tht girl. Hahah okay sick. Gna go suntanning and jamming! Altho I'm not those playing instruments but i guess it'll be fun. \m/

Sometimes seeing some faces could make your day, but some other faces just reminds you of shitz.

A year passed in a blink of an eye

Heylo, alright the weekend was awesome. Friday helped cleaning his house and all, Saturday went to shop and he did a little cute stunt in the night, rly sweet altho it wasn't v well-planned. Sunday went to watch Karate Kid in GOLD CLASS, gold classssss motherfkers! Hahah. The seats were awesome, awesome service with awesome food and awesome blanket. Hahah! Enjoyed my time there. Went Sentosa after tht, walked arnd, didn't rly suntan cause the sun is being a bitch. Played megazip and luge ride twice, fk megazip was damn nice but I'm still scare of skyride idk why. Had mache for dinner, niceeeee. Okay tht's all for now. School has never been good for me including some family problems right now yet no one is trying to understand my situation.

Fk off motherfkers i don't need yur fking tears when it's alr too late.

I'll give you my heart on a string

I think this is rly cute. Hahah. Do be do be do. Lol. Evry Thurs or rather RI is srsly fking lame i swear. Anw, went to class tgt and rly got fking cranky cause she fking naggy. zzz. Got back paper and whoa, it's rly a shock. Hahah. But I'm contented. (: Nothing much, just woke up not long ago from my awesome afternoon nap. Hahah. Missed the jamming session. Gna start on RI's blog later. Fking long nv do up blogs alr. Hahah. Alright. Bye bitches!

So just say, that you'll stay awake for me.

I think of you more than my heart beats

Hey fkers, today my feelings got played by 2 bastards. Rly. Call me while I'm bathing, didn't pick up only tht's it, they got the time to think of a prank. Told me i scored v badly for my paper, and i just got in a rly bad mood. Reached sch and found out I'm one those A in my class. Wtf, srsly 3 years in TP first time this alphabet appear i swear. Hahah. Anw, walked into the class quiz w no clue about the answers to those qns. Went to do proj in the lab and they fking tweet, make my hp ring dnknw how many fking times. Crazy shitz i swear. Ate at bizpark and went for lecture. Finally submitting my SIP form, let's just hope nothing goes wrong.

Coming for you i admit I'd rather give you the world, or we can share mine. (:

Fked up

Fk, i lost my thumbdrive in the sch and no kind soul actually return or whatever, so sry about the keychain babe. Anw went to sch for a proj consultation, it was rly a shock but nvm, ate lunch at bizpark and went to see a doctor in the afternoon. Reached home and that's it, drop dead on my bed. Fking tired i swear. There's class quiz tmr, like wtf idk why this subject the teacher love to give random tests, and have to do up a checklist by tmr. Zzz i feel fking fked up, like srsly i wna murder somebody. This weekend I'm gna bloody hell enjoy it better than any weekends, sleep like fk. Hahah. I need fooodddddddddddddd.

I'll nvr forget the gentle look in yur eyes.

We don't do shit

Easy to lie to everyone but hard to lie to myself. Taken for granted? I hope not. When i run towards you, you didn't open your arms to catch me w all you can, when i started to turn away, that's when you grab me and pull me into your arms. Am i suppose to always turn away so you can always learn to treasure me? Anw, first day after the holidays was rly shitz, i swear. Don't understand why when you don't wish to see some faces, you always manage to bump into them by accident but why you're dying to see some faces, but they just never appear within your sight. Sucks huh. Went for lecture in the morning, was glad that i went though, attendance was taken and all. Apel was in the lab which is stupid, rly. We rushed rpb collateral like as if this whole group has only 2 -3 members. Submitted and went for lunch opposite sch after settling all the journals shitz. I'm suppose to end school at like, 11 or 12pm? But i stayed in school till fking 5pm just doing proj w ker. And the nicest qns brian asked was "where's the rest?". Sick and tired of all these shitz, srsly. Gna start on RI or whatever fking shitz that i can do now cause submission deadlines are fking nearing and i still have another fking individual journal to hand up. Motherfkers. I deserve a good break i swear. Fking tired.

When the spark dies off, it will just be friends forever.

A step back can make a person smile

Hey. Okay, Saturday was alright didn't went for his soccer match in the afternoon cause wasn't feeling that well. Oh wellz, at least he took care of me before he went down for soccer. (: Waited for him to get home and set off to tampmall. I srsly think that tampmall is like my 2nd home, rly. Hahah. Walked around but was rly lazy cause every shop i walked in, is as though the apparels are free or somethg, evryone grabbing and all. Hahah. So shitz. So i decided to look for Father's day present instead, bought a wallet and wristband for my dad. Glad that my dad appreciated the stuff i bought for him, he's so cute i swear. Hahah. Night we watched 'She's out of my league' online and the movie was rly rly stupid, srsly. Like stupid funny kind. Hahah. Had mac for supper and couldn't finish it cause i wasn't hungry at all, just accompanying him. -.- Anw, sunday woke up at like 4plus? As in afternoon, ridiculous. Lol. Went to tampmall AGAIN, but this time i bought somethg. (: Bought like tops and all, and some stupid shitz big board for my stupid fking proj. Grandma house next for so called "father's day celebration", went off to starbucks to meet Tavis and Sab. Lepak till late w tavis and i need to sleep like rly soon cause i have to wake up at like 7.30am in the fking morning. Bye motherfkers.

how far are you willing to go, for me?

World cup fever

She like so cute right? I know. :D hahah. 3 guys in my house crazy over the whole world cup thing, ok my brother is not as bad as i thought he would be. My dad was worse than him. Uncles ~ Hahah. Ytd didn't managed to go for proj meeting and meet Rac for dinner. So sorry about evrythg, wasn't feeling so well the whole day, whole body feels damn soft i swear. Today skipped his soccer as well, don't feel the excitement anymore. Anw, tmr's father's day. Over here, i wna wish every father a happy father's day, esp for tavis's dad. (:

Your love is killing me.

Always will

Srsly I'm starting to feel that talking things out doesn't rly work effectively, because afterall actions have to be done in order to prove your words, right? (:

I'm not rly upset and all although some emotions can't rly be controlled, but I've matured. I know that being rash, being too impulsive might not be the key to evrything, it might just even make things much worse than you can ever imagine. Okay today did proj at raffles for just 1hour plus because the rest of the 1hour plus is having lunch @ mac. Wheeeee awesome. It's been so long since I've eaten mac. After that just went home and was soooo bored. Gna continue doing proj tmr in school again and meeting Rac for dinner. :D No r/s is perfect, there's no point in finding some r/s which doesn't exists any lies, hidings, disappointments again and again, trust being thrown and built all over again, cryings, laughings, and many many more shitz. But i guess all these are what makes up a rly real r/s huh.

I wna last long, i wna do the best i could for this, i wna try my might to be the best gf and evrythg but it's just stupid i realized. Feel so stupid keep thinking for the person, being so nice and all, keep trying to make things work and happen when it obviously couldn't base on my solo efforts. Humans are all selfish, and i guess i just didn't wna try to be human, oh wellz, now I'm gna try to be one.

Sometimes I'm rly lost, where are you?

Insomnia is so fucked up

I fucking can't sleep at 4plus am now, srsly don't know what's wrong w my body. It's becoming like total shitz. I feel so tired, my head is hurting, i feel nauseous all the time, like srsly. Is this what they called, insomnia? Yucks. I don't wna get tht. Many thoughts going through my mind, would you wna ask me out, take me to this rly cool place to chillax and start concerning? Hahah. I think I'm rly going crazy like what Ker had said. So fucked up, i feel all fucked up. The weather is fucking cool these few days, rly keep raining like free, feels damn good but yet at the same time freezing. Why can't it just be balanced out nicely, like sunny yet windy and all. Okay i think I'm starting to talk nonsense, so i better stop before it got worse. Hahah. I'm fucking starving now, kitchen has food and idk whether i shld like go do something about it. Damn. This world cup is driving me crazy, like rly. I wna slap all the guys tht are going almost insane for it. I wna bloody hell bang my head against the wall and just die. I wna sleep! Fuck, i think I'll just go lie down in the living room. Why lie, why hide, why do it behind and why why why, i feel like strangling you. Hahahahahah. Guys just suck, rly i swear, like almost all of them, okay all of them. Joyce, when are you coming to pick me up? Okay this is sick srsly. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh fucking going crazy in the middle of the night. It's like when you're w friends w this guy, he will like tell you almost evrythg in his life, like honestly. But when you guys got into a relationship, things got different, he stop telling you and even worse, he starts to do like srsly stupid stuff that pisses you off ttm. Why? Because they are stupid! They are childish! Mother fuckers.

Okay I'm off, I'm rly gna sleep in the living room for the night. I wna share evrythg about me w you, but you? _l_

And then you shot across my sky

Hey. Did proj in school today, was quite alright i guess just that somethg srsly dirty just polluted my eyes. Yucks right. Anw, credits to tavis, our rpb has some hope w the photos. Hahah. I'm alr tired and photoshop is just shitz, suck at it cause it's just so complicated. Don't even wna learn or play around w it also. Hahah.

Went tamp after that, had crispy chicken and milk tea. Like nice. Hahah. Lepak at starbucks for awhile and had late dinner, shitz, wanton mee again felt so sick of it. Hahah. I think I'm gna skip wanton mee for like weeks or somethg. Lol. Went back to starbucks and chillax, Ker rushed off after knowing tht the match has alr started. Funny. So continue slacking w Tavis till late and went back home. Nice, talked about life and evrythg. (Y) Love it. Alright, gna go off real soon cause tmr's 2pm again! Hoping tmr's weather would be really cool instead of floods or whatever. Hahah.

Would you go the extra mile, just for me? (L)

I'm changing, cause i love you so much

Today wasn't so bad, i did like half of IMR individual journal cause by the time i woke up almost half the day is gone. Hahah. Anyw, met babe and his friends at tamp today. Had dinner and walked around aimlessly. Srsly, had totally nothing to do till we had to sit down at macdonald, watching world cup and people cheering at each goals. They left early, and i went to meet Sab to chillax for awhile. It was nice, rly. Reached home and wash up all. Feels kinda wasted missing the portugal match. Damn. But anw, I'm feeling a little pissed over this whole world cup fever.

Things are getting a little over and it's really pissing me off, like srsly.

Was walking at tamp when we saw starhub customer service was showing world cup live, so we stood there less than a minute figuring if it was really live. Just when we were about to walk off, we got sarcastically scolded by some uncle. He was rly rude i swear, and it's not as if we stood there for mins, it was less than a min. Fucker.

I'm also sick and tired of all the bettings, hearing people betting this and that, how much and all. Seeing everyone bringing their laptop just to bet and all. Okay maybe the laptop is not for tht purpose but whatever!

Fuck off.

The distance is killing me

It's the last week of holidays and i doubt I'm gna enjoy it except for the coming weekends. Watched the losers, overall fucking cool shit. Love the sniper (thanks tavis for correcting me alright) -.- he's fucking awesome, rly. Anw, missed babe but was happy for him when he managed to overcome his fear and jumped off twice. Real nice. Let's hope I'm able to get something nice before school starts next week. Damn.

The fucking alcohol on my table has been staring at me the whole day, and i believe it'll continue for the next few days till it reaches Saturday. It look so niceeee and all. Shitz.

Gonna rush and do projs next few days, still have individual assignments, what kinda shit is this. Hate school, always do.

Fuck it's alr 15th June and i still have no idea what to do on the 28th. Shitz, someone, anyone? Help me. Feels kinda exciting though. (:

Alright, that's enough. Gna go watch tv, play some itouch games and nights.

Imy & ily

Take me by the hand

Hold my hands, tilt my chin up gently, look me in my eyes and tell me you will never let go of my hands and never ever forget the way we looked at each other, the way we hold each other and the way we kiss each other.

Okay Friday watched Shrek Forever After. Kinda lame but that little guy dnknw what name, so cute. He got different wigs for different situations. Lol. Bought dinner home and eat.

Saturday soccer @ Sengkang. Lost by 1 goal. Shitzcxzczx, own goal + penalty = GG. Not gonna rub it in, but this is not the first time babe scored own goal!! HAHAHAHAHAHA. Okay chill.

After that, went home and all the shitcxzcz just started. Went to bought 2 breezer, just realized that cheers sell those at quite a cheap prize. (:

Walked back to my old house area and all the memories just flow back like nobody's business. It was nice, the feeling is really nice. When i step on the pathway, a smile just painted itself on my face. :D He slept real late cause of the England match and he ate my fishball noodle that's meant to be my dinner ! Basket.

Sunday went to Suntec to walk around, nothing much actually, then went to have kuishinbo for dinner. T.T $50 just fly away like that. Feel like crying, don't even feel like shitting the food out at all. LOL.

Home sweet home. And i realize, problems can't be solved just by having your own thoughts. You gotta share your thoughts in order to solve the problems, because 2 heads work better than 1. However, if one person got tired because 2 heads create even more problems then what will happen in the future?

Okay i want to sleep alr. Tired, tomorrow still need to continue my farming game. Haha! All the best for babe cause he's gonna jump this week. Make sure you land properly and open your parachute k ! HAHAHA. Don't die before me. (:

I bleed my heart out just for you

Why the thought of turning lesbian? Why the thought of being single? Because being in a BoyGirl r/s is just so fucked up. It just screw all of your fucking emotions into something insane.
It's been so long since i lose faith in love. It's been so long since I've been a playboy. It's been so long since I've break someone's heart. Kinda miss the feeling.
Sometimes, i feel really thankful to have some people in my life. I guess those people should know who they are. (:
I'm sure that this emotional feelings running inside of me is definitely not part of my period's side effects.
Nobody's life is perfect, neither is mine.
Sometimes when you feel like sitting at some corner, and cry your heart out but the tears aren't coming out. Is it cause you're not upset enough? No. It's cause your heart has became numb.
Sometimes i wish for some things that are not exactly impossible, but wish for some things that are not within my control.
Love is the start of a sin, love is the start of cruelty. Love is what you seek for enjoyment. So what's the point of being so serious in love? What's the point of holding onto the love you're having? Many people may seem happy on the surface but deep down inside, no one can ever imagine what the person is going through.
When a young teenager starts to grow faster and more mature than what normal teenager should, they experience many things that no one would ever wanna experience.

People say I'm always talking cock, always cheerful always saying lots of nonsense that makes people laugh and smile. Always entertaining others, trying my best to make them forget the troubles they have and always looking on the bright side. But when i get back home, locked myself in my room, what's left is a quiet, emo and painful me.
Sometimes it's really tiring to put on a smile 24/7, really tiring to put on a smile on others too.

Sometimes, i will also hope that there is this someone out there trying real hard to put on a smile in my heart. When all you want is for things to be real simple, but what gives you is something way way more than complicated.
How nice to be a small little kid, when you play real hard in the day and got real tired at night. After one good night sleep, you wake up with no troubles on your mind.

How i wish i could be selfish for once, and not come into this world.

She's all that i need

This dog, gonna die from sleeping i swear.

See how sleepy her eyes are. -.- Speechless.

Super big. He said this bowl is for him to wash his face. -.-

Did IMR proj in the afternoon w Sab. Gonna move on to something else tomorrow or what. (Y)

Went to meet babe and his friends @ Tamp for movie Karate Kid, end up no slots available. Went to have dinner @ Kim Gary, it was awful srsly, i would not recommend people to go there, unless is people i hate. HAHA. Alright, went to play arcade to pass time. Walked around tampmall looking for my diary. Walked around tamp1 and all. Went back home after everything. Simple yet sweet. Love it. (:

No more blessing in disguise

Have you ever stop believing in love? Have you ever believed in forever and eternity?

I once believed in it, maybe because i was young and stupid, always watching those lame dramas and thought that maybe true love really exist. Gave in my all, gave everything i could to make it happen but turns out to be a joke. From that day onwards, all i know is love is something you use to make yurself feel happy, to lie to yurself that you love this person wholeheartedly. Love is something you can either have it or not, doesn't really make a difference, doesn't really matter. Because afterall, at the end of the day you'll still be alone, either you stopped loving the person, or the person stopped loving you. It is something you use it to pass time, to make your life more interesting for that period of time. I once believed that in this world, there are still clean, decent, nice guys, I'll be able to meet such guys in my life but it was plain naive. Woken up from my fantasy and i knew in this world we're living in, there are no such guys. Such guys only exists in dramas, acting as a perfect guy every girl would die for but in reality, he's just another loser.

Forever and eternity are just words you use to please a girl, are words you go dictionary.com and search and remember what's the meaning. They are not words that you can apply it in your life, and never will be. Words are only for references, you google beautiful quotes and phrases but actually there are MORE quotes and phrases that contradict those quotes and phrases.

I know i was silly, naive and innocent at that time thinking that my life could have happy endings like every drama would have. Now that I'm forced to wake up in reality, i know that such a simple girl, such a simple person can never survive in this reality. I knew this world is tainted, but i once believed that at some corner, there will still be some place that have some people who are pure and simple minded without any complicated thinkings. But no, I've learnt my lesson knowing that being born into this world, you have to accept the fact that this world is tainted, this world can never be how i thought it would be, it is a suffering, a torture to come into this world therefore death is always an easier way out. Even going to hell is better than coming into this world. I've given up all hope. I know what I'm suppose to do, suppose to think, suppose to say, and i can never ever be that simple minded person ever again because i have to learn to be complicated in order to survive.

Those reading, don't be offended. It's just my personal thoughts.

What you hold is my heart

I admit this shit is cute. haha but only for this

Invested dnknw how much to hit the jackpot

Jackpot prize. :D

Today I'll make good use of this time to rest at home, the rest will be projs alr. Sianzzz.

V lazy to cook maggi for myself to eat.

Anyw ker is leaving tonight, enjoy yur trip k! Will definitely miss you! (: Take good care of yurself over there.

Dnknw what to write alr. Bye

Happiness can be simple

Fried mars bar is the sexxxzxzcxzcz!

Ever seen someone getting so excited over arcade games? My small little boy over here.

This dog is 0.98m and the name below writes beverly. LOL

Alright. Today watched prince of persia and it's not bad actually. Sands of time -.- Turning back time -.- yeah right.... Lol. Had something amazing in my life, which is the fried mars bars, if you're a chocolate and ice cream lover, that's the best thing. It's like fried chocolate plus ice cream topped with chocolate! Aweeeeesommeeeee ttm.

Had lunch at this place which have great mango dessert that he loves. (:

Bought this watch for both of us and one shit for him. LOL.

After movie, walked around and really enjoyed our time laughing and irritating each other. (:

I'll rmb the black store that sells really expensive stuff. I'll rmb the hug i need when I'm cold and he went singing some weird tune and ignore my words. I'll rmb the spoilt LED in the MRT showing that it's reaching Simei but actually Lavender and he kept talking that the sands of time allowing us to fast forward the time, and arriving Simei at such time travelling speed. LOL.

I'll rmb how excited he is when he caught stuff in the arcade. I'll always rmb everything, about you.

Letting go means being strong enough

Live beautifully, Dream passionately, Love completely.

We're afraid we care too much for fear that the other person doesn't care at all.

Easier said than done.

Finished all papers and officially started holidays for 2weeks. How exciting! :>

The papers are all like shit to me, overstudied for every fucking paper but it's okay. Got it over and done w alr. (Y)

Ytd night was bullshit but thanks to my friends. (Y) They like really trying real hard to enlighten me, psycho me and using many different words and examples just to make me get over the stage that I've always unable to cross. (: Really appreciated.

Dnknw since when i became like what i was in the past. Get rid of the fucking habit bev, it's time to grow up!

Fuck, I'm craving for my double whiskey now! DANIEL!!!!! Lol.

I can deal w Jim beam, redbull or even breezer right now! Anyone sweet and nice enough to sponsor me? Hehehehe.

Idk why but the whole fucking day, there's like millions or billions of butterflies in my stomach flying around like free. Zzz.

Okay maybe i go watch some show first! Byeeeeecxzcz and HELLO to HOLIDAYS! :D

Nobody can get satisfied

When i get so affected by something, yet you're not doing anything to make me feel better? Then who are you to me? Your past is driving me insane, I'm afraid one day i couldn't even take it. So you rather lose me than do something about it?
You always claim that when other guys come and talk to me, they have bad intentions. But slowly one by one turns out to be normal only. So does that mean that your instincts are wrong? Then when your EX see properly, they are not normal friends, they are EX gfs. They come and find you, you can keep defending them like nobody's business. Why i can't say that they have bad intentions also?
I'm really v v upset. bye.

Earthquakes can't shake us

I feel like eating madjack again! Lol.

This is chocolate icecream mix w chilli, water, pepper, porridge and i cannot rmb what else. :D

She look like some crazy dog.

Awwwwwww

Makes me feel like zipping her into the bag.

Anyw, I'm gonna start on rp3 later. Really lazy, just finished 2 chapters only. zzz. Today's RI paper is shit. I don't even know if I'm able to pass the paper, don't even talk about scoring well for the paper. Although the individual assignment got me a B grade but it's just 10% = 10marks! Sigh, nevermind I'm gonna study hard for Rp3 then, let's hope this time i overstudied but effectively. =/

Went to make my spectacles ytd and it cost $68 only. Counted cheap alr, but realize my degree now is 300 for both eyes and no longer 275. T.T the person said 275 can wear, but not sharp enough. Shitz.

Went to take MC also, and guess how much it cost, $9.50 because i didn't take the medicines given. Hehe, and i use the machine to pay my nets. (Y) Forgot to submit the MC today, tomorrow i think I'll go down school to submit it and get my spectacles as well. (:

Quarrelled the past few days. A lot of problems and idk if now things will change or be better, but i really really do hope it gets better before anything bad happens..